I am struggling to find a way to tell my BIL that his frequent "visits" to our home from Iowa is really pissing me off.  My wife is afraid to tell him straight-up since she is afraid of hurting his feelings and destroying their "family relationship".  Little does she know that she is destroying our relationship by not addressing this issue.

I wish he would follow the standard rules for houseguests:

1. Visits of once a year are appropriate (as opposed to the 4-5 times he comes each year).
2. Follow Ben Franklin's rule - "like fish, after 3 days, houseguests begin to stink" (as opposed to his standard 10 day stays).
3. Follow the rule that your stay should not cost your hosts any money.
• Pay for your own food.
• Pay for your use of utilities, especially elect during the summer.
• And take your sister to dinner once in a while (and not MacDonald's!!).
4. And don't yak and yak in my TV room when I got the game on!!

Do you think I am being unreasonable??